Scam and Eggs

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE WON A PRIZE

From: info.notification-oficina@888.com
Subject: CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE WON A PRIZE
Date: January 20, 2010 2:49:15 AM PST
Reply-To: info.microword.notification@ozu.es

Spanish888 Corporation Promotions
Foreign Costumers Unit: Galicia, Spain
Web-Link : http://es.888. [edited]

Reference Number: MKQ/811/PPD

Okay, I have this odd reference number written down, prepared to claim my huge prize. Thanks!

Date: 18/01/2010

Wait a sec... when is the first day of the 18th month? This is America ver here, and we do not do dates like that. We stop at 12.

Does it wrap back around and become June again? I just don;t get it.

Spanish888 Corporation Official Final Winnings Notification

If this a Final Winning? Like, I can't win anything again? Or is this a Final Notification, where I can rest assured you won't send me any more notices ever again? Either way, I do hope you write back. There's a lot of money on the line!

Your email address has won, in the http://es.888.com casino automatic online sweepstakes promotions.

Hello!? My e-mail address won? My e-mail address cannot collect. My e-mail address has no bank account, and, frankly cannot even drive yet.

Your email address was selected randomly from the http://es.888.com automatic computer generated email online promotion draw, no participation ticket sold and your email address emerged as one of the online winners in Category A+.

You guys have an automatic computer? Sweet! Mine is completely manual. In fact I have to pedal just to get enough power to check my e-mail.

This attracts a prize of three hundred and fifty thousand Euros 350,000.00 cash.

Wow, I totally see, now, the need for an 'automatic computer.' Mine doesn't attract anything except other geeks who want to check out my power supply. And none of them are hot chicks.

I'll be I will be a chick magnet, though, with 350Gs of Euro cash. I don't know the exact conversion formula, but that's probably over 190 USD!!!

Prizes will be paid to lucky winners by our nominated paying bank and lucky winners that leave close to Spain are obliged to come to our office in Spain to begin their claim Legalization process.

This leads me to believe there are 'unlucky winners' by inference. Did you mean to imply there might not be any money available for me if I am not a lucky winner?

Also, I live in a small town in California, so that's the only place I leave from. I never leave close to Spain.

There has to be some other way to start the claim Legalization process. I mean, we can't leave it in its current illegal condition, now can we.

For more information's, on how to claim your prize, do contact the claim processing paying bank operation manager via email or telephone including your Reference Number: MKQ/811/PPD.

I notice you use the possessive form of "information's" and a simple Google Search using my manual computer shows that MANY people have access to my unique Reference Number. Why doesn't this surprise me.

Contact: Mr. Abbal Bidson
Office Tel: +34672533162
Email: contactnet@ozu.es

This promotion is organized by Spanish888 casino to advertise and to promote our http://es.888.com website, and as well to encourage the use of the Internet and to promote computer literacy worldwide.

Well, you've encouraged this fellow to use the internet, but I think that I will stay away from your worldwide literacy promotion. You use the possessive form of "information's."

Which — as everyone know's — is wrong.

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Monday, January 18, 2010

INFORMATION

From:     kelly1000brown@yahoo.com.hk
Subject:     INFORMATION
Date:     January 15, 2010 1:54:33 PM PST
To:     kelly222brown@yahoo.com.hk
Reply-To:     kelly1000brown@yahoo.com.hk

Before I respond, may I congratulate you on obtaining both kelly222 and kelly1000 from Yahoo Hong Kong's free service. Did you also manage to get the rest from kelly223 through kelly999? Which one should I write to until we get this minor financial matter wrapped up?

Lloyds TSB Group
plc 25 Gresham
Street
London
EC2V 7HN
Attn.......

(Were you thinking for a moment there? Or did you forget my name? What is the meaning of 7 periods?)

My name is Kelly Brown,i am the Auditor General and computer manager
here in our Bank (Lloyds Bank TSB London).I have only written to seek your
indulgence and assistance.

Wow! Auditor General and computer manager? you must be busy. Were you ever an auditor lance corporal or anything lower like that? And what happens if you don't manage the computer? Does it send out scam e-mails?

I wish to make a transfer involving a huge amount of base 15,000,000.00 {Fifteen Million B.Pounds Sterling} of Late Rudi Hermanto out of the bank,

Hold on a sec. Are you transferring 15,000,000 pounds of the Late Rudi Hermanto? Or his money?

And why do you call him Late Rudi? There was a girl in my high school we called Fast Trudy. Coincidence?

he died a long time ago (on records),

Oh. That explains his lateness.

And another weird coincidence: Trudy died on a stack of cassette tapes.

till now the account remained dormant.

Well let's you and I see what we can do to fix that?

I am proposing to make this transfer to a designated bank account of your choice. Thus, for your indulgence and support, I propose an offer of 25% of the total amount to be yours after the transfer has been successfully concluded.

Are you kidding me? You'll pay me $375,000 for transferring all that to the bank of my choice? Sweet deal.

I'm going to find out what bank Bernie Madoff used, and have you transfer it to them. I don't think they asked a lot of questions, like "Are you sure this isn;t a scam?" So we should be safe.

Now that I think about it, this seems terribly risky and, as they say, "I smell a rat." I don't know why they say that, but they do. Anyway, I'm not moving any further with this plan you're hatching unless you agree to 26 or 27%. Do I look stupid to you?

Your full name and phone number/fax is needed in the first place.

Alright. I will go to the first place and tape a piece of paper with my full name and phone/fax under the entry rug, right hand corner closest to the door.

Kindly reply me stating your interest, and I shall furnish you with the details and necessary procedure with which to make the transfer progress.

I think you already have the most pertinent information. Lets proceed.

I am anxiously awaiting your response.

Oh, and I am yours.

My Information will be given to you in my next mail. Reply me immediately.

Please consider this as 'my reply you.'

Thanks and God bless You.

Regards and Respect.

Kelly Brown

Looking forward to being insanely rich without working.

The mediocre speed Dave

Keen to meet new people

regard, sweetheart

Maybe it's just me, but that's an unusual salutation.

Well, I start with saying that I am a special girl!!! I am cheerful,
kind:hostess and queen.

Wow! I'll say! I have never had a queen write to me before. Especially the cheerful, kind, hostess-type of queen. I am delighted to hear from you.

I like interesting people, whose who can keep up the conversation.

Me, too, but frankly, I think that is asking a lot these days. What with the long time between e-mails and instant messaging, I admit that sometimes the lag bores me. But I do try.

I respect people who take responsibly for their words.

Do you mean that? I mean, that's serious stuff. Does that represent your heart? Your beliefs?

I like to enjoy life the way it is.

Me, too. Except for the death part. I could do without that, quite honestly.

I am calm, emotionally stable, positive and friendly http://first-loveall.com/alone/

Hey, that was kind of weird. You posted a link to nowhere in the middle of your sentence. It that part of your emotionally stable self?

I dream to meet reliable, clever, kind man and create harmonious partnership and have happy future together. I like home coziness and warmth of beautiful feelings between people. I value reliable character, diligence, intelligence, sense of humor, ability to compromise, ability to love, kindness, desire to find a partner in life, sincerity.

Well, I don't have any of that, but I have lots of money and I am looking for someone to spend it on in trade for long walks on the beach, holding hands, drinking piña coladas and getting caught in the rain. Fortunately, you admire compromise. Are you willing to give all of those things up for money?

my turtledove, Having good time!

Yes, Having good time to you, too, my sea urchin.

Turtle Dave

PS - I feel a little bit 'not so special' knowing you wrote this to many other people. Please, reassure me by writing back to tell me that this is not actually a scam letter written by a man in Nigeria who will send me a picture of some random beautiful woman scraped off the internet, claiming to be her, and then developing a relationship with me, then pleading for a little bit of money, and then more and more, and so on.

Not that I don't trust you.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Paypal Money Request

Here's a new angle...

I got a legitimate Paypal Money Request from Cris Carriaga (cris_carriaga2006@yahoo.com) today. It was for $5 and the "details" said "Book Donation."

I have no idea who this person is.

I wrote back:

Huh?

Why do you want my money?

I received a response today, as well:

It is only for donation

our library needs new books

hope you donate

thanks you

God Bless

I guess he thought I would just pay it out without asking. I wonder how well that one is working...

Thursday, May 14, 2009

From Nina Douala

The Scam Letter

From: Nina Douala <sandra_konne110@yahoo.co.jp>
Subject: From Nina Douala
Date: May 14, 2009 5:35:48 AM PDT
To: ninadou4u@yahoo.co.jp
Reply-To: ninadou4u@yahoo.co.jp

Dear One,

Good day I am Nina Douala.

So, is this a secret deal, Nina? I noticed you are using the e-mail address of Sandra Konne "110" in Japan, and that you have secured other Yahoo addresses in Japan, also, like that of some gal named Nina. I also notice you are sending this e-mail not only to me, but also to yourself. I am getting back to you, and suggest you also get back to yourself. I'm just trying to keep things tidy, yet can't help but notice this has all the markings of a secret mission.

Don't worry. I get it. This is secret... And you and I? — we're cool.

From Abidjan Cote d'ivoire, I wish to request for your urgent assistance in my investment plans in your base

How did you know I had a base? Your people are good. I have had a secret base on my Montana property for only a year or so... I thought it was well hidden, but maybe your people want to invest money with me to make it better hidden?

I could use the money. Do you know what I grow?

I am calling in respect of the transfer of money ($6.500,000) Six Million Five houndred thousand

Ha! I do that all the time. "Houndred thousand," "forty for" and "sebbendy sebben" are all easy mistakes to make. And I always get eleventeen mixed up with the number that comes before twelb...

united states dollars

Ummm... isn't that supposed to be capitalized?

only deposit in the bank by my late Father Mr Joseph Douala who was a wealthy Cocoa Merchant here in Ivory Coast.

I don't mean to sound like I doubt you, but how did your late father deposit the money if he was 'late?' Around here that means 'dead' and dead folk don't get around to the bank so often, given their condition.

I wish to invest this money in manufacturing and real estate management in your base,

Did we get our wires crossed somehow? I grow illegal herbs on a large property in the mountains of Montana, mostly covered with fishnet and leaves, and other forms of camo. Now if you want to invest in my 'product' then you need to address all your inquiries to my boss in Columbia, Juan Valdez who has a donkey, and they both like coffee.

this is because I inheritated an important sum from my late father who died in recent political crisis in Cote d'Ivoire here.

Cote d'Ivoire? I thought you said you were from the Ivory Coast. Make up your mind. Do I look stupid to you?

And another thing, $6,500,500 is not an 'important' sum of money. It's a frickin' boatload. Holy Moly! Do you know who I am? That's more than I make in a week!

Before the death of my father he informed me near his hospital bed at chu-teaching hospital, that he has saved the in one of the bank here in cote d'Ivoire with my name, and I have made every inquired to confirm the existence of the deposit.

Well, I am no doctor, but it sounds as though, since your father was in such bad condition, he should have been in the bed, not near it, and they should have been doing something other than teaching him how to chu if he was that bad off.

Nonetheless, I am glad he was able to inform you of the deposit, and you have verified its existence.

This money was been deposited for my social security and for fruitful international investment.That is why I need you to keep this transaction highly confidential and trustworthy person who will assist me to receive this money overseas for investment establishment purpose indurities and lucratives profitable ventures.

Hey, I am all over those indurities and lucratives. Seriously.

Do not, I repeat, do not invest in proclivities or monstrosities. They are not moving right now. Best to invest your money in my base.

I want you to send your full name so that I will go and submit it to the bank and I will officially make you my foreign partner and the bank here will endorse it and transfer the money to your bank account and I will appreciate it if you send me your direct phone number for easy communication.

Wow. Things are sure easy to get done there on the Ivory Coast. (By the way, is that where they make that floating soap?) I swear, if all I did was submit a name e-mailed to me and ask for $6.5 Million Dollars to be transferred, they would take me a way in a tight, backward bathrobe sitting in the front seat of the short bus to Loony Land.

But if you say so.

My full name is Terrence Kloth Boxers

Thanks and anticipating to hear from you immediately you recieve this mail.

It's "receive." Remember the rule: "I before E except after C, and in worlds with neighbors in the way."

Simple.

God bless. Please you can reach me through my private e_mail address nina_douala@yahoo.com

Wow, yet another e-mail address. You get around. (wink, wink)

Yours Faithfully.
Nina Douala.

Please, the faithfully is all mine. Talk to you soon, when I am rich beyond my wildest dreams.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Looking for Fun,Travel and Good Times.

The original scam letter

From: Ludmyla <comercialn@ciadox.com.br>
Subject: Looking for Fun,Travel and Good Times.
To: <A long list of recipients, alphabetically arranged>
Date: Friday, May 8, 2009, 5:16 AM

My dear friend

Love is the emblem of eternity; it confounds all notion of time; effaces all memory of a beginning, all fear of an end.

Wow, that was just beautiful, I think. I'm not much of a deep thinker, but that sounded -- I don't know -- poetic? It sounds like you have a very big heart, and I don't mean like the enlarged heart medical problem.

Did you write that? You're deep.

Website: ***-the-reallove.com/****/ (edited)

I am beautiful, harmonious, very sexual, kind, cheerful person. I love children very much. Good company, kind people, animals and the nature are important to me. Very much I like to travel, learn new, to visit historical places, especially I love exotic places.

I visited your website. Wow you're like a model -- And I don't mean like in the miniature scale reproduction sense, rather like one of those pretty women that gets used by large companies to sell things like tools, batteries, cars, cigarettes and other stuff that one would not ordinarily associate with procreation.

By the way -- and I think I speak for most men -- the "beautiful, harmonious, very sexual" items are all pros, but the "I love children very much" and the "animals and the nature" comments might be cons. I dunno, maybe it's just me.

Also I like very much to sing, dance, float, go under a sail, I like to drive the car, I love speed, at the same time with pleasure I will drive on a bicycle, flied on a hang-glider.

Oh my gosh. You like to float? I haven't found a girl who liked to float since I broke up with my girlfriend Linda back in the 70s.

She hated pea soup, by the way. It always came up.

And, being an avid water sports kind of guy (when I'm not watching reality shows at 2am on MTV, of course) I like to go under a sail, too. Nothing beats the ol' going under a sail!

We have a lot in common, you and me. And I don't mean common in the homely people sense.

I, too, have been known to, on occasion, drive on a bicycle or two, but usually when backing out of a driveway without checking behind my truck first. You're the first girl I have ever heard of that actually likes that. Maybe me and you could do that together sometime.

I don't want to screw up our relationship, but I have to admit I have never flied on a hang-glider. Flieding makes me a little nervous.

I love rather an extreme.

I know what you mean. Me, too.

I am very friendly person, love dialogue, not the disputed person.

Well, I notice from your picture that you would be a very good mother to any infant (or two, if not more), so really, between you and me, the friendly dialogue thing is not the priority.

I am not the disputed person, either.

Never.

I love and be able is tasty to prepare dishes of any kitchen of the world.

So, you make nice crockery? Can you fashion steins like the ones in Oktoberfest in Germany?

I like beer a lot.

By the way very much I love flowers, gifts with all the heart, attention and pleasant surprises!

You love flowers. Well, there's my big surprise for the day... an attractive women who likes flowers.

I'm just kidding.

I do that a lot.

Well, I have a pleasant surprise for you: I would like to marry you, and if you want, I will send you $10,000 to get your affairs in order and buy a plane ticket over to my house in the Mojave area of California. The climate here is always the same. You will love it.

Can I trust you?

So long
Lyuda

Wow... that was quick. Over before it began.

I'm shocked, and I'm hurt.

Well, it was nice while it lasted. Thanks for thinking of me, and so long to you, too.

I will miss you. And not like the throwing a rock but not hitting you sense.

Always here, eating Cheetos,

Brian (not to be confused with brain).

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

ªÑ²¼¥æ³Î¥N¹Ô´Ú

(Seriously! That was the Subject of the e-mail I got)

The Original Scam Letter

From: niehjane@cm1.hinet.net
Subject: ªÑ²¼¥æ³Î¥N¹Ô´Ú
Date: May 10, 2009 2:42:36 PM PDT
To: diymmogame@gmail.com

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Man! You eat with that mouth?

Ha! It's just a joke... see, there was a typo in the first paragraph, and it kind of changed the meaning of... um... well never mind... back to what you were saying...

Look, first of all, I agree with everything you said. Better than I could have said myself.

Really.

But just to make sure we are on the same page, when you said "¶r«æªA°È±M½u¢¯¢¸¢²¢·¡Ð¢±¢¸¢·¡Ð¢¯¢³¢¸(24H)" you seem to be suggesting that it all boils down to 24H, but my friend Bob was thinking there might be an error in your calculations.

Get back to me on that, won't you, so we can move ahead.

And here's the answer to your test question: A tall glass, two scoops of vanilla ice cream, some root beer and an elephant!

Did I get it right?

Waiting to hear back,

Poindexter Wizzard